Unending Conundrum


After all this time, I thought the biggest conundrum on Earth is women—but seriously, even now I can’t seem to discern women behavior entirely. But I’m not going to talk about women here. But I think that even though they’re somewhat not like as they seem, they have a magical aura that can radiate love and peace.

But honestly, I think the biggest conundrum in my life is myself. Really.

I tried understanding myself for my entire life, and it seems I have failed to do so. For the most part, it’s because I don’t really know what I want in this life or who I want to be. Either I don’t have a solid stance or maybe because I too easily perceive my opinions flawed after having arguments with someone.

But if those arguments come from my family, they usually want something better for my future; or myself at the moment.

Yeah, I was that stupid and weak. And even now, I’m not even sure I’m taking the right major, to be honest. But I can’t back out now because I am on my third year of college, so all those money for my education would be meaningless if I quit.

Luckily, after the harsh education given by my sister, I’m slowly becoming better—or at least that’s what I think. Although I’m still striving to be better, I can understand myself better right now—but not completely.

And I think, this conundrum of myself will be unending.

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